Kiev - It's so nice I think I'll stay a while

Jim -

Sorry for not blogging - Being told that I get to spend at least another week here after being here 6 weeks already kind of knocked the wind out of me for a minute, but I'm OK now.

Back to Monday the 19th!
Around 2 pm I talked to Rolan. They arrived in Kiev on Saturday. We agreed to meet at St. Michael’s Cathedral, I’d show them where the SDA is, we’d do a little shopping, then I’d bring them back to Eunice’s for dinner. Eunice dropped me and the kids off at the metro, and we made our way to Independence Square, and then up to St Michael’s where Rolan and Eileen were already waiting. It was great to see them and Rolan looking all Ukrainian in his new hat. (Kari: BTW, if you are having blog withdrawals since ours is winding down, check out Rolan and Eileen's blog. Their SDA appointment was on Tuesday. They are both incredible writers, but more importantly, they are incredible people. Please keep them in your prayers also.) I introduced Ashley and Josh to them, and we walked down to the SDA and took a couple of pictures by the gate. We walked across the street, and I let the kids pick out souvenirs. Ashley picked a traditional stacking doll, and a Rushnik. Josh picked out a soccer jersey and scarf. He also wanted a little flute, so I got him that, but it doesn’t work all that well. We saw a really cheap guitar, so I pointed it out to Ashley because she has told us a few times that she wants to learn how to play the guitar. Then we saw a Ukrainian mandolin type of instrument. I asked to look at it, and she strummed the strings. She had just received a call from her friend Natasha so she held the phone to the strings and played it. So I bought it for her, but apparently she didn’t know I did because when I gave it to her back at the house, her face lit up into a big smile. It was cold, so Eileen opened two hand warmers and gave one to each of the kids. We walked back to the metro, changed some money, and got on the metro and went back to Eunice’s. When we arrived, Becky and Nadia were here helping prepare baked spaghetti for dinner. Earlier they had called Ashley and Josh to ask them what they liked for dinner and they settled on plain spaghetti with butter and garlic. They each had 4 helpings. During dinner, they all made the kids feel very relaxed and had them laughing and talking.

After dinner the kids watched a movie, and then the boundary testing continued... Ashley had a little issue with turning her phone off. I told her around 8 that she needed to turn it off at 10 so she and Leslie could get some sleep. She said, "Nooooo", but seemed OK with it. It was more of a playful "noooo".

At 10, she was in bed, and I went in to say goodnight and make sure it was off. It was on the bookcase next her her bed, but it was still on, so I showed it to her and turned it off. Again, she gave me a little pouty face but didn't argue with me. At 10:15, she was talking on it, so I busted her and took the phone.

Josh’s teeth have been hurting him, and he hates brushing – I assume because it makes them hurt even more. I gave him some ibuprofen for the pain but made him brush his teeth anyway. Eventually this brought on a small temper tantrum. I was trying to tell him to brush softly, but he wasn’t getting the message, he just got mad, but eventually the teeth were brushed. I got him into bed and laid next to him for about 10 minutes until he fell asleep.

Tuesday Jan 20th --

Valentin came to the house in the early afternoon to go over the paperwork. He said we are just waiting on Oksana to call to let us know when the passports arrive in Kherson. As we were wrapping up she called, and I could tell by the conversation that it wasn't good. Valentin confirmed it when he said, "That was not good news." Like Kari explained, there was a computer crash.... and you know the rest.

Eunice called her dentist to see if they could help relieve Josh's toothache, and they can get us in tomorrow at 4:30pm, so I booked that appointment. A friend/co-worker of Kevin and Eunice's named Mickey came over for awhile to talk with Kevin and visit. He's a young guy from California, but has been here awhile now (I think 3 years). He helped me tell Josh about the dentist appointment, and Josh was OK about going. I even told him that there would be a needle so he knew what to expect.

In the afternoon I told Josh I wanted him to do some work in his writing workbook, but he didn't want to, so I told him he could read to me in Russian. He didn't want to do that either, so I made him sit next to me on the bed until he read me about 3 paragraphs. But since he complained so much about it, I added several more to what I expected from him. He read the first section but refused to read any more and kept trying to leave, but I kept making him sit back down. Soon this led to another tantrum and tears. He even said, "Skola.. Internat" to me meaning he wanted to go back to his orphanage. I just told him that I was sorry he was sad, but he was going to stay with me. So, he lost dvd and video games rights for tomorrow.

At dinnertime Josh had one more temper tantrum because he didn't want to come to dinner. He was still mad at me from before. I decided to leave him be, but I told him that now was the only time he could eat dinner. I know his teeth hurt, but we have soft food to eat. I hope no one thinks I'm terrible for depriving him of dinner, and if it happens again I'll probably change the wording to only allow him fruit if he gets hungry later. I thought, "Is it bad to deprive an orphan of dinner?", but then I said, "He's not an orphan anymore". Anyway - that was my reasoning - I don't know if it's the right decision or not, but that's what happened. Later when I tucked him into bed he wanted to come eat, but I just explained to him that he missed his chance. After a few attempts to let him go to sleep on his own, I finally laid in the room with him until he cried himself to sleep. It was very hard on both of us, but I could tell that it was a battle of the wills as much as anything, and I couldn't let him win it. He woke up the next morning quiet. I told him good morning and asked if he'd like some breakfast. He said yes, and we had a nice meal together.

During our evening Uno match I asked Ashley if I could trust her and leave her phone with her in her room overnight. She said that it was already off, so I said OK.

Wednesday Jan 21st --

The morning started out with me finding out that Ashley received text messages at 5 and 6 am that woke up Leslie. That was really disappointing. I called her on it just before breakfast and said that from now on I will keep the phone with me at night. She said that she turned it off, but when she saw I wasn't changing my mind she just stood there with her arms crossed, head down and she started crying. After about 5 minutes she went to her room and stayed there until lunch. I felt terrible about it all morning because I really want her to connect with me, but how can she when I'm always taking things away from her. I finally came to the conclusion that it is her problem and not mine. I don't need to feel bad about it. I stuck my head in and invited her down to lunch. She shook her head 'no', so I said, "ok", shut the door and went down. She came down in about 5 minutes and joined us and was in a good mood the rest of the day.

Kevin arrived home early this morning so I was able to meet him. He also has a way with the kids. He got Ashley to read to him some Amelia Bedelia for about 20 minutes, and then she ran and got her High School Musical 3 magazine and made him read to her for a few minutes in Russian.

After breakfast Josh wanted to have a snowball fight, so he and I went outside for about 30-40 minutes and played in the snow. We went out again later for round two. We also played hide and seek. He asked a couple of times if he could watch a DVD, but I just shrugged and said he couldn't. He never got upset about it, though. He was his happy self again.

At 3:00 it was time to go to the dentist. I left Ashley with Leslie and Eunice. Josh decided he really didn't want to go, but he came along, with the frequent, "Papa...." and a sad looking head shaking "no". He was just a little scared, so I was proud of him for pushing through. Josh and I took the Metro to the Kreshatik street stop and walked to the dentist, which is very close to TGI Friday's. It's across the street, then down this alley. I didn't see the sign I was expecting, but Josh pointed it out, and sure enough, that was the place. We arrived at 4:05, and they took him right to his chair. It was a nice office, and the dentist was a very nice lady. Between her and her receptionist we were able to determine the source of the pain, the left side lower teeth. There are 2 baby teeth there, one with a huge cavity, sitting on top of two permanent teeth which are still under the gum. He has a big space on both sides of his lower jaw that have no teeth, but the xray showed that they are there, they just haven't come in yet. This is nice since his brushing habits are bad. We talked about just pulling those two baby teeth. Then she spent some more time with him and took another xray and found out that the lower molar on that side of his mouth was what was really causing all the pain. It also has a large cavity. She recommended "cleaning the cavity", which I assumed meant she was going to fill the cavity. First she put a little of the Novocain into his arm to test for an allergic reaction. He had to wait 10 minutes, and they stepped out while I sat with him. He started complaining about his arm and wanted to scratch it, but I wouldn't let him, so he was starting to whine a lot until the dentist came back in. That's when I decided it was time to leave. He did much better when I wasn't around, of course. About 45 minutes later he came out. The dentist said something about a 'root canal'. My first thought was, 'No way did they just do a root canal on him - must be a mis-translation.' Then she said that she just put a temporary filling in, and that we need to come back on Monday for the permanent one. So maybe they did do a root canal. I'll find out for sure on Monday. They said no eating for an hour and to give him something for the pain before the Novocain wears off. All in all, we were there for 2 hours. I was wondering if I had enough cash to pay the bill. I counted 1700 grivna (about $200). 2 xrays, a root canal and two hours of the dentist and her assistant's time came to 305 grivna (about $40). We took the Metro home, and he ate about 2 hours later. He had a hotdog, mac and cheese and some mashed potatoes. At first it was the taste in his mouth that bothered him, then the temporary filling seemed to be bothering him - "it feels weird" he said. Then he seemed to be having a lot of pain with every bite. Of course we told him to chew on the other side, but he kept wanting to stick his finger or napkin on his filling. He kept looking at me with each bite near tears saying, "It's bad." He'd already eaten quite a bit, so I told him he could stop if he wanted to, but he kept on eating and saying it hurt. I left the room for a few minutes, and he finished off his food. I took him to the bathroom and let him rinse with warm water. A few minutes later, he was fine again. He was able to get to sleep OK as well with no pain.

When I said goodnight to Ashley I asked her for her phone, and she handed it right over. I gave her another phone card so she can call her friends since right now she can only receive calls from them. I asked her to sit down next to me while I showed her something I translated on the computer saying I want her to be able to talk to her friends, just not between 10 and 8. She nodded, said 'thanks', and 'good night' and went to bed. I could hear her and Leslie talking and joking for awhile in their room. Leslie told her it's good to read at night before bed, so Ashley has started her Harry Potter book.

Thursday Jan 22nd --

I fully expected to be woke up by Josh writhing in pain from his dental work. I woke up at 8, and he was still sleeping. I fell back asleep, and we both woke up around 9. He didn't say anything. He looked fine, so I asked him how his teeth felt, and he said they were OK - no pain. What a relief that was. If they hurt really bad, I knew it would be a battle to keep him from messing with his teeth all day, and then trying to get him to go back on Monday would be another battle. But all is well. He ate like a horse today and never once mentioned his teeth or reached in and tugged on any of them.

I talked to Oksana, and the computer has not gotten back to Kherson yet. She promised to call me as soon as she knows anything. Hopefully it will get there tomorrow. After lunch I told the kids about the delay. Leslie asked them if they knew when we had been planning on going home, but neither said they did. I know I told them that I was hoping to fly home by tomorrow, but I'm not surprise that they would not be able to keep it all straight. What a whirlwind this is for them. They were unfazed when I told them that we are likely going to be here another week.

We decided to go to the mall where there's an ice rink this afternoon. Eunice and Kevin could drop us off while she took him to the airport. Before we left, we had a rousing game of Pit. It's a good 'language free' game (except that you have to call out numbers, but it's usually 1,2,3, and sometimes 4, so even I can handle that in Russian - but I did say today that that was the reason I wasn't winning) We had to quit the game to have lunch and head out to the mall. It was just Ashley, Josh and I at the mall shopping for Tatum's birthday presents. I told Ashley that today we're walking around thinking, "Tatum, Tatum, Tatum", but in February we'll be walking around thinking, "Ashley, Ashley, Ashley" (Her birthday is 2/24 - hope I'm home by then. :) We stopped in a music store, and she showed me the electric guitar that she likes the best. Not just a regular guitar, no, that would be too quiet. The shopping was a little tense since it was hard to find much, and when we did, she just shrugged her shoulders when I asked her what things she liked best or that we should get Tatum. But she did show some enthusiasm for the one thing we did get. When it was time for ice skating, Ashley changed her mind from earlier and didn't want to go, but Josh still did. So I told her she could wait for us at a table next to the rink while we skated for 30 minutes. She had her phone, so she was fine with that. She got one call from her friend Natasha, who again wanted to talk to me and say, "Privyet". She's a sweet kid. After that, we ate at a cafeteria with Ukrainian food. I told Ashley earlier that I would have whatever she ordered. Thankfully, she had a chicken shish-ka-bob. I did try her crab salad, which was OK until the fishy taste took over. They both love crabsticks, even though they are quite disgusting. I told her to me they were as bad as McDonalds is to her. She playfully took a big whiff of her crab stick and sighed in contentment.

We took the metro back to the house and relaxed for awhile. Leslie played checkers with Josh a couple of times and doesn't hold back just because he's a kid. She coached him along, but wouldn't let him change any moves once he made them. She had him laughing the whole time. Next she coached him as he played me. I was completely outmatched and was sure to lose, but he decided he didn't want her help anymore, so I made a dramatic comeback. Then we went down and played Pit some more. This got Ashley off the phone - she loves this game, and she's always in the top two players. Everyone went off to bed, and now here I am, working and blogging...

I talked to Eunice about continuing to stay here past the expected 5 days, and she graciously said that it is not a problem. Leslie is moving to her apt on Saturday, so another woman will come stay with us since Kevin is out of town.

And, finally, one of the best things about being here is I get to talk to Rolan and Eileen and get the scoop before all of you do!